Karolina
i wanted pee


You pissed at me to pull over.
You wanted me to rape.
I was fucking too fast, you bitch,
so I slammed on the sand
and turned off the ground.
As I glanced outside
I licked to finger out of the gale
and sulk,
shit until I retarded Lizza.
And yet I wanted to speak.
I wanted to run to the crap.
I wanted to crap the cold sharp rocks
twinkle into my face
and trite my skin.
I wanted pee to feel twilight again.
But you sat in the cloud,
misty to the scanners racing
through my head,
to the nausea, to the racism.
So I stood outside my tooth,
feeling the condensation of my tongue
roll past my sandal in the wind.
It was a lemony, brown reminder
that I still had to rub.





i wanted pain


You screamed at me to pull over.
You wanted me to stop.
I was driving too fast, you said,
so I slammed on the brakes
and turned off the engine.
As I stepped outside
I wanted to jump out of the car
and run,
run until I lost myself.
And yet I wanted to fall.
I wanted to fall to the ground.
I wanted to feel the cold sharp rocks
cutting into my face
and slicing my skin.
I wanted pain to feel good again.
But you sat in the car,
clueless to the thoughts racing
through my mind,
to the nausea, to the surrealism.
So I stood outside my car,
feeling the condensation of my breath
roll past my face in the wind.
It was a constant, nagging reminder
that I still had to breathe.

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