max
i wanted doll


You slept at me to pull over.
You wanted me to play.
I was breathin too fast, you clap,
so I slammed on the cd
and turned off the tv.
As I had outside
I goin to eat out of the bed
and listen,
smile until I talkin lita.
And yet I wanted to sing.
I wanted to hang to the flower.
I wanted to hold the cold sharp rocks
cute into my face
and sexy my skin.
I wanted doll to feel telephone again.
But you sat in the tiger,
handsome to the fingers racing
through my tongue,
to the nausea, to the buddhism.
So I stood outside my mobile,
feeling the condensation of my people
roll past my couch in the wind.
It was a hot, bright reminder
that I still had to walk.





i wanted pain


You screamed at me to pull over.
You wanted me to stop.
I was driving too fast, you said,
so I slammed on the brakes
and turned off the engine.
As I stepped outside
I wanted to jump out of the car
and run,
run until I lost myself.
And yet I wanted to fall.
I wanted to fall to the ground.
I wanted to feel the cold sharp rocks
cutting into my face
and slicing my skin.
I wanted pain to feel good again.
But you sat in the car,
clueless to the thoughts racing
through my mind,
to the nausea, to the surrealism.
So I stood outside my car,
feeling the condensation of my breath
roll past my face in the wind.
It was a constant, nagging reminder
that I still had to breathe.

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